Breakdown
   by aquamirror (aquamirror@aol.com)
   Rating: PG

"Goddess.."

The voice bounced off the chamber walls, filling the room
with a low echo of despair. It's origin, a hunched-over
figure in the center of the room, made a desperate effort
to contain the pain. Arms wrapped around her body, long,
twisted hair falling haphazardly down her back and spilling
her shoulders, she took a deep breath, fighting the tear
that threatened to break down the barrier of her emotions.

"Not.. this time. No." She shook her head angrily as she
reached her hand out, grasping the cool stone floor beneath
her. The attacks had happened before, but never like this.
Never before had she felt utterly helpless and deserted,
with everything she wanted, the one thing she needed
dangling just that extra inch beyond her reach. She
swallowed in an attempt to calm herself, make everything
"right" again..

"Damn it, what's the *point*?!" In a rare display of
temper, she flung the pillow beside her across the room,
knocking down a nightstand and breaking a vase standing
behind it. The noise of the crash made her stop, a slightly
embarrassed look on her face. however, it was wiped away within
a fraction of a second as she stood up, brushing off
nonexistant dust particles and straightening her clothing
once more.

She wasn't going to start this, she didn't need to add
insanity to the growing list of downsides of her position.
As she picked up a brush, combing through her knotted hair,
she paused to consider exactly what the perks were to begin
with. Coming up with only two, and the first not even
something she could draw up more than dutiful concern for
anymore, she focused on the second.

The brush soothed her nerves as she stared into the depths
of her handmirror. The golden frame, with the silhouette of
a woman clinging to the side and a trail of flowers curving
over it, the heavy jade backing swirling with the magic of
the item. It was part of the problem, yet it was part of her..
That could be applied to several things in her life. Gazing
into bubbly silver depths, she called up an image to herself,
allowing one small priveldge that she knew she would regret
later.

The eyes focused first. Blue-grey, with a hint of mischevious
gold flickering through them.. Her hand shook again as the
memory of those eyes made her knees weak and attempted to
loose the wall of tears again. Next, a soft sprinkling of
short white hair, the same color as the stars she could see
through the thick window beside the closet. Closet, what a
joke. She had been remaining in uniform at all times for
the past four centuries, having lost any childish urges she
once had felt for dress up games. Those had been removed
from her heart at the moment she realized the hopelessness
of it all.

She could still remember the last night she hadn't worn
the familiar costume. That had been the most amazingly
wonderful time she had ever had, even if it had ended in
this. With a glare of disgust cast at the room around her,
she ignored her elegant furishings in what was nothing
more than a glorified prison. She remember the time when
she was almost free, when she could go where she wanted
and do what she wanted and spend as much time as could
possibly be spent with whomever she chose. She knew who
that would be. Even the palest reminder in her memory
made the image in the glass sharpen.

Soft lips. Her own lips trembled as they recalled the
feel of them against hers. The deep, throaty voice that
could melt her into crystalline puddles with a word.
Her entire image appeared, arms outstretched, appearing
to reach through the confines of the mirror for her.

It was almost too much, but she had no tears left. With
one sweeping motion, she knocked the larger mirror from
the wall, watched with detatched interest as it fell,
disintegrating into millions of tiny fragments. The larger
pieces still reflected her own image, showing her aqua eyes
turn a colder shade as she closed off the pain. Opening the
chamber door, she exited the room, her talisman in hand.

Circling a pale blue planet, a castle hung suspended in
the airless space around it. The glitter of stars in the
distance blinked faintly as a scream rang through the palace
below.

Sitting on a throne, a three-pronged staff propped idly
beside him, a bearded old man sighed.

---------------------------------------------------------
So it's weird. So it has little or no plot. Heck, it's late
and I've lost that personal touch. Or maybe the majority of
the ideas I might have thought of someday have been used.
?_? Deal with it. --; Questions? Comments? Email my toll-free
service line at AquaMirror@aol.com. Oh, yeah: the story is
about Neptune (not really Michiru, since it's during that
abstract time period of the Silver Millennium..).

             the illusive aquamirror (November 11, 1998)

  "You blink and I'm gone. *blink* Gone *blink* Gone *blink* G-"
    "Stop that *blink* gone stuff. It's driving me crazy!"
  "It appears the balance of power has shifted my way."
--------------------------------------------------------
Copyright stuffs and whatnot: Yep, it's yours, Takeuchi-sama,
 Toei, Dizney (Dizney?), Bandai, TV Asahi (or not). I have taken
 your ideas/product/whatever and USED it for EVIL ENDS!
 Muwhahahahaha.. waitaminit. I'm not getting paid for this!
 I want to talk to my lawyer! ::stomps off in a hurry::