Illusion Part 6 by Blaze PG Where do we begin to get clean again can we get clean again -3eb Illusion part 6 As Serena studied their faces around the table she realized it wasn?t doubt. Well at least not on the scouts and Darien. On their faces their was suprise, confusion, and uncertantity but not doubt. Kit and the generals were another story. Serena hung her head how could she ever tell them. The things she had done and seen. She felt a bit ashamed and afraid. Afraid of how they would react, of what they would say and think. Serena had never been strong. Well she had but not in self-confidence and her friends. This had always been her weakness, her downfall. That and her emotions. Emotions weaken people and Serean hated to be weak. She steeled herself up. ********************************************************************* ******* Kit watched Serena. She couldn?t help but doubt. She had felt that she knew Serena inside and out but now.... She watched Serena and saw the pain in her eyes. She could tell Serena carried a huge burden. One look in Serenas eyes and you would think she was older than her years. She felt bad for serena but she had to know. Then Serena closed herself up. Her face went blank and looked weary and her eyes were empty. You could see nothing iin them. No life, joy, pain, or anger just nothing. But Kit had to push the matter. " What really happened to Dad? The words echoed in the silent room. Serena gave a self-mocking smile " Now thats the question everyone want the answer to isn?t it " Serena said flatly. " Please tell me Ren " Kit pleaded. Serena focused on the wall behind Kit?s head. " Remember when Mom and Dad took us to the doctors and they gave us those stupid tests. You know those IQ ones. We were 5 I think. Ever since then I hated being smart. I hated the fact that we finished school at 10. Resentment and hate build. Their not like happeniess and joy which fade away. I meet this boy named Shock when we were 11. He taught me stuff no one else could. He was my first friend. Its sort of sad I had never had a real friend until him. I was sort of desperate. He introduced me to his friends and asked if I wanted to joiiin their club. Of course I said yes? Serena stopped and gave a bitter smile. " I?ve always been idioticlly trusting. Anyways I didn?t know it was a cultlike gang. At first it was fun and all but then I was initiated and I found out the truth. By then it was to late.? Serena said. " Initiation ? " Kit asked and Serena turned around and lifted her shirt. Everyone gaspsed carved into her back was a cresent moon. " It was my sign. You know I?m a cancer and in astrology my planets the moon. Anyways I was in and I had friends. Things were cool for a while. I was having fun and thought I finally knew who I was. Then things went downhill. Don?t ask I?m not telling. I was trying to get out. I wanted to organize my thoughts. This didn?t go well with the others. It came down to a final battle me against Shock. Dad wasn?t suppose to be there but he was. He destracted me and Shock took advantage of that. Dad got in the way of the attack and well he died? she said the last part quietly. " What happened to Shock " Matt asked and a gleam suddenly came into Serenas eyes. " He died " Serena said coldly. Everyone exchanged looks at this. Kit just sat shocked. She had never really known Serena. She had doubted earlier but it was now confirmed. She got up and started to walk out of the room. Serena shot to her feet " Don?t you dare Kit. Don?t you judge me. You have no idea what it was like? she said and Kit turned her fist clenched. " I never knew you. You were my twin sister yet I never knew you. " Kit said as tears poured from her eyes. " You wouldn?t understand. You have no idea what it was like to have no one. You don?t know what its like to remember everything I?ve done. You don?t know what its like to carry all this responsibility. You don?t know what its like to never be able to forget. You have no idea what its like to see someone you love die because of you. You have no idea what its like to have killed. So don?t you dare judge me!!!! " Serena screamed a bit hysteraclly and teleported away. Kit sunk to her knee?s. " I?m sorry Serena " she said as she cried. ********************************************************************* ********** Serena sat unseeing at the lake. Her eyes were clouded with tears. How could they judge her. The generals had worked for Beryl. That should be reason enough for them to trust her. She trusted them even with the Beryl thing. Kit ha drun wild during the SM (Silver Millenium). She had always been the bad one. Now it seemed as if their places were reversed. Serena had been suprised that the scout and Darien had only been confused. In a way it mad her anger toward them lessen. She sat with her chin on her knees. Suddenly she felt someone strocking her hair. Looking up Serena saw Blaze standing over her. " Why " She asked not really knowing what she was asking. " Come with me I?ll show you why " Blaze said holding her hand out to Serena. Serenas stared at her for a long moment then she took her hand. ********************************************************************* ********** Thats all for this week. I?d like to thank all the people who have written to me about my story. It really makes me feel good to read what people think of my story. Illusion is probably going to end in part 9 or 10. Then I?ll probably come out with my story Love and War. Its an alternative story you know one of those stories where she?s not Sailor Moon. Its goiing to be mainly revolve around Serena, Darien, and Beryl. Well hope you keep reading my stuff. Oh and please excuse all errors. - Blaze - ______________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com