Author's Note: This part is dedicated to David (Tuxedo Kamen) Grana.
When I started this story, he asked me to try and explain the different
attitudes of Darien as Tuxedo Mask and the Moonlight Knight.  I
couldn't find a way to fit it in earlier, so I wrote this epilogue.  Also, this
ended up being a little longer than planned, so I hope you like it.

Insecurities Epilogue

"Darien!"  At the sound of his name, the young man turned, bracing
himself for the impact that was coming.  Sure enough, a blond bundle
of energy barreled into him, nearly knocking him to the ground.

"I'm glad to see you too Serena."

"Really?" she asked, looking at him in wide-eyed rapture.

"Really."

"Does that mean we can go on a boat ride in the park?"

"If you want.  But first, I have to drop some stuff off at a friends.
Do you mind?"

"Nope, as long as I get to be with you," she enthused.  As Darien led
the way, Serena continued to gaze at him.  Leaning in closer, she let
out a soft sigh.  "I like this," she said simply.

"What?" Darien asked, a puzzled expression on his face.

"Being near you," she answered.  When she realized what she had just
said, Serena began to blush in embarrassment.  "I mean . . . that is,
uh . . ." she stammered.

"It's okay.  I know what you mean, and I like it too."

The two walked the rest of the way in comfortable silence.  Darien
kept his arm around Serena, liking the feel of her soft, warm body
next to his.  The moment was perfect.  It was what he'd always
wanted; to be with Serena.  No fighting, no danger, no pain or
confusion, just the chance to be with her.  Darien decided it was
something he could get used to.  Something he was already used to.

Breaking out of his daydream, Darien stopped and looked up.  "Well,
here we are.  Just a little longer and I'll take you on that boat ride.  Okay?"
Serena nodded her head enthusiastically in response, making her hair
flap like rabbit ears.

A few moments and several flights of stairs later, Serena was standing
outside an apartment, trying to wait patiently for someone to answer
the door.  Finally, after Darien knocked for the third time, the door
flew open.  "Sorry you had to wait.  I guess I fell asleep," Serena heard
the nameless, but apologetic voice say.  "That's what I get for staying
up late studying, huh?"

"No problem.  I just wanted to return these books.  Thanks for the loan."

"No problem Darien, especially considering all the help you've given
me."  Suddenly, the guy slapped his hand to his head.  "Oh man, I am
so rude.  Would you and, uh . . ."

"Sorry," Darien replied.  "I should have introduced you.  Matt, this is
my girlfriend Serena.  Serena, this is Matt."

"Nice to meet you," Matt said, extending his hand to shake Serena's.
But Serena didn't notice right away.  She was too busy staring at Darien.
When she finally regained her composure, she grabbed Matt's hand,
shaking it vigorously.  By way of an apology, she shot him one of her
trademark, dazzling Serena smiles.  Returning the greeting, Matt waved
them in.  "The place is a bit of a mess, but come on in."

"Sorry, but we can't stay.  We've got other plans," Darien said.

After a quick goodbye, Serena and Darien turned to leave.  Once they
were well out of earshot, Serena turned to Darien.  "You introduced
me as your girlfriend," she said quizzically.

Hesitantly, Darien responded.  "I guess I did.  Does that bother you?"

"No.  I liked it.  It made me feel," here Serena paused, searching for
the right word.  "Good.  It made me feel good.  But you've never
done that before."

"I know.  Do you remember yesterday, when I told you that you would
never have to doubt my love again?  Well, that's what I meant.  I want
to show you, in little ways and big ways, just how much I care about you."

"But, Darien, I don't want you to do things that make you feel
uncomfortable."

"Serena, you don't make me uncomfortable.  I do."  Looking into
her sweet, but confused eyes, Darien knew she didn't understand.  "I
love you, but this is all so new to me.  Having a girlfriend, caring about
someone this way.  I just don't know what to do or how to react.
I'm afraid to say or do the wrong thing, so I just never said or did
anything.  It's my own insecurities that make me feel uncomfortable,
not you.  Understand?"

"Not really.  I mean, you always know the right thing to say as Tuxedo
Mask."  Suddenly, a silly grin broke out on Serena's face. "And you
were waaaaay romantic as the Moonlight Knight."

"It's not the same," Darien tried to explain.  "As Tuxedo Mask, I never
really say much."  With a glint in his eyes, he continued.  "You just
think it's romantic because I come out of nowhere to rescue you.
Sometimes, I think you get in trouble just so I have to save you."

"That's not true!  I mean . . . I would never . . . You can't think,"
Darien put a finger to her lips, cutting her off.

"I was just teasing.  But seriously, other than saving you from danger
and giving you a few words of encouragement, I never really say or
do much.  As Tuxedo Mask, I could HIDE behind the mask.  It
protected me, the same way I used insults to protect me."

"But, your words always give me the strength to keep fighting.  Even
when I want to give up, or when I think there's no hope, you give me
hope.  Without you, I would have lost to the negaverse a long time ago."

Darien pulled Serena closer, for a moment overwhelmed by her words.
He knew how much she meant them, and that made him both happy and
afraid.  It made his heart soar to know that he was such an important
part of her life.  She needed him.  For a man who had spent most of his life
trying to avoid needing anyone or being needed in return, somehow
being needed suddenly seemed very important to him.

But her words also made him afraid.  Serena's greatest strength, what made
her more powerful than the others, wasn't just her royal heritage.  It was
her unwavering loyalty and love.  He knew, without a doubt, she would
sacrifice anything to protect not just those closest to her, but everyone.
But without confidence in herself and her own abilities, she was setting
herself up for failure.  She depended on him so much--to be her courage,
her confidence.  He was terribly afraid that one day, he wouldn't be there
when she needed him.  That somehow he would fail her, and she would
be lost to him.

"But, I still don't get it," Serena said, breaking into Darien's thoughts.
"I think you're romantic as Tuxedo Mask.  And I think you were even
more--what's the word?--de-mon-stra-tive, as the Moonlight Knight."

"The Moonlight Knight was different Serena, very different.  He
wasn't real.  Not really."

"I know, but he said he was you; your memories, your feelings.
Wasn't he?"

"Yes and no."  Darien sighed.  He wasn't sure he could explain this
to Serena when he didn't quite understand it himself.  "The Moonlight
Knight had my memories of the Moon Kingdom.  He had my memories
of being Tuxedo Mask and Prince Endymion.  But he wasn't me, not the
man I am now.  He didn't have the memories or emotions of the little boy
in the orphanage, of the lonely young man with no family.  Those
memories, those feelings were still inside me.  Do you understand?"

"I think so," Serena said hesitantly.  "Being alone and not having a
family made you sad, and you never stopped being sad.  But Muffin,
you don't have to be sad anymore.  You're not alone.  You have Andrew
and Raye and Amy and Lita and Mina and even that guy Matt.  They're
all your friends.  And I promise that as long as you want, I'll be here for
you.  I'm your family now, and I promise you'll never be alone again.
So please don't be sad."  At the last, she threw her arms around him, holding
on as if she would never let go.  And Darien hoped she never would.

"Oh Serena, you do make me happy.  Even when I'm sad, it's not as bad
as it used to be because I know I have you."  Darien's voice trailed off, but
his thoughts kept going.  As long as I have you, he thought, life is worth
living.  So I promise you and myself that I will do everything in my
power never to give you a reason to leave me.


The End

send comments, flames, etc. to me at corina_borsuk@eee.org