A fan fic by Caleyndar. Rating: PG. Notes: The names for the two new characters Haruka / Uranus and Michiru / Neptune, are the japanese names. The reason for this is I did not wish to use Neptune's english name "Michelle" as another character with the same name already exists. Once again, thanks to those who have written to me. If you have any comments or questions, please send them to: I realise that this chapter may be confusing, as it switches to and from small different time settings. If you have any queries, please ask. And please, visit my web site at: http://members.xoom.com/caleyndar/ Diclaimer: None of the characters belong to me; only the few I make up. The story, however, is mine. The Name Endymion... Part Four: Angel of Tears... Chapter One... A drop of water. Oxygen and hydrogen. Watch it. As it falls, falls, an endless journey. It touches the body complied of the same substance, sending out perfectly round, ever expanding rings. And then it was gone, as if it never existed. Another tear. Was this from happiness? Were these tears that I cried filled with joy? These clear droplets of water, forever falling from my ocean like eyes, to join with the crystal clear pond before my kneeling form. My hands, those hands that had held the weapon which had severed the last of my innocence from me, pressed themselves against the earth. Earth. Home? Was Dawn right? Did I know that I could not belong here, even if I loved this small corner of the galaxy? Even if this was the only place where I could be at peace? The last time I had touched this soil. When I had been filled with those same raging emotions as I felt now. Times change. I controlled even that now. So I cried here, alone, with no one to see these tears but myself. Less they crystallised. Less they locked away my pain and anger so I was one who was cold and unloving as my Father. No! Do not think of him! The tears fell from my eyes again, dropping with grace into the small pool. Warmth pushed against my back, and a soft whinny reached my ears. And I just broke down. I sobbed, crying out my heart, my pain. I wrapped my arms around his neck, pushing my face into his silky mane and just poured out my endless tears. I had promised myself never to cry again when I left. That had been another life time. Or so it seemed. Yet I cried now. Just as I had cried every night since my return to Earth, the green and blue planet hanging in the emptiness of space. Three weeks had passed. Since I had left what I did not wish to know, to remember, behind me. My Father?s death, Serenity, everything. Yet it followed me. It never left me in peace. Why could I never find peace? Even now, on Earth, the one and only place I had ever found peace? Why had it left me even here? And so I cried. Raged, sobbed, screamed. A mask covered my true soul as we arrived on Earth, dressed in civilian cloths, my loyal generals and I. My face was blank, without emotions. There were no tears as I found myself standing apon the surface of the planet I considered as home. "Home," I whispered, and dropped down onto my knees in the middle of the quiet road. My shaking fingers reached down and felt the rough surface of the black tar, feeling the warmth left there by the sun. And I just began to laugh, throwing my head back to let the sunlight blind my eyes. "Home!" I cried and jumped up and danced around like an excited child. "Brother?" The voice of an innocent child. Michelle. Only older, a little more grown up and wiser to the ways of the world. I turned and stared with wide unbelieving ocean blue eyes at the young girl who was walking towards us, heading home in the afternoon after school. Michelle, Michelle. She had been eight when I left this planet, though she had always been small, always light, like a perfect doll with golden curls so much unlike my midnight shaded hair. "Darien!" she cried, and ran to me, dropping her bag as she leapt into my open arms. I embraced her, feeling the genuine love I had longed for the last two years. Those two long, torturous years filled with pain. So much pain, so much hate. So much anger and regret. "Where have you been? Mother and Father have been so worried. And Nicki?s parent?s too!" she said innocently, gazing trustingly into my eyes as she clung to my neck. I merely smiled and started walking home. Home, home, home. Nephrite picked up Michelle?s forgotten bag before following the rest of us. Lies, lies, lies. Where have you been? Why did you not call us? I couldn?t answer. I was lost. Kunzite waved his hand, and I could feel his mental fingers plunge into my adopted parent?s mind, answering their questions, confusing memories which could not be answered nor explained simply, innocently. I stared at him in shock, and he gave me a bitter smile. Surrounded by love. Embraces. Praise to that non existent God for my safe return. And who were these friends? Questions, questions, questions. Lies, lies, lies. The wind pelted me as I flew down the road apon my bike. A bike which I had not used in two years. It would have been so easy to teleport. But I wanted to feel human, and I wanted to be alone. I had left my generals in search for a place where they could stay. A house near mine which they may purchase or rent. They always seemed to have much money. But then, technically, I was still the Prince of the Earth Kingdom, and they my highest ranking generals. "You are silent, Endymion. Where is your rage at me? I have lied to you, used you, loved you. Won?t you strike me? I am the cause for all of your pain, your suffering." Armand?s words. My generals had been ordered out of my Father?s throne room, along with his body. His blood still stained the stone floor. Only Armand and I filled the immense space around us. My sobs had died away, and the only liquid staining my face was his blood, mingled with my shed tears. But my eyes had dried, and seemed glazed over, vacant. I still stared at the blood on the floor, at my crystal sabre that lay there, as dead as my Father. His soft tread advancing towards me. The predator. Always was. Only I had been too blind to notice. Too foolish to see what was as bright as daylight. And then he stood before me, blocking my view of which I stared so intently, so blindly. He was standing apon my Father?s blood. Soft silken fingers lift my chin. Large brown innocent orbs stared into my raging ocean blue ones. Laughing. Forever laughing at me. And his soft smile, always playing apon his lush red lips. The colour of blood. Then he kissed me. All over my bloodied face, taking in the blood and salted tears. I threw him back, revolted as I realised what he did. I think I whispered the word "Vampire!" for the first time with such disgust. "Why do you do this!" I gasped, staring at him with wide eyes. "Do you enjoy my pain, my suffering, as my Father did!" I began to scream. Armand laughed. "I am not as petty as him. And he deserved to die, Endymion. Do not blame yourself for his death. And do not blame me, for I was not the one who controlled your body. But I dare say his death will, has, helped me greatly!" he smiled secretively. "What are you hiding from me, Armand!" I demanded. "Why is it so important that I live!" He laughed again. "Ah, perhaps you should tell me what you hide from me in that conflicting mind of your?s? Something you saw on your little mission?" The other immortal. The one dressed in red velvet, whose manner and voice was like that of a teacher, wise and ever patient. Almost god like. Marius. Armand?s maker. Armand snatched the thought from my mind and paled. And then vanished, moving with such speed from the room it seemed he disappeared. The only sign of his leaving was the wide open doors leading to and from the chamber. I arrived alone at my old riding school, staring at the seemingly desolate buildings. Nick, Nick, Nick. He smiled his charming smile when I approached, brushing back his golden blond hair from his sky blue eyes as he stood up and greeted me. "So, that's your new horse?" No, Darien, do not think of the past. Times which can never be replaced. Your best friend is gone. And whether you will see him again or not lies in the future, not the present. I leaned my bike up against the ever familiar tree. But it seemed it had been a thousand years ago. My memory of it was so faint, so distorted by every other memory forced onto me in the last two years. All those memories I would rather forget. On familiar paths I walked, tracing out the so very faint happiness I had experienced here. The smell of horses assaulted me, sent me reeling in ecstasy. How I had loved this place! The softest whinny reached my ever sensing ears. A sound which I had heard many times in my last few weeks on Earth, a sound which I had come to love and know off by heart, so that is had subconsciously become a secret language between him and me. It was like being lost in a fantasy. Reaching out though the haze of happiness that surrounded me, I touched his face, feeling his ever so soft coat under my fingers. His magical form pulled back and snorted, shaking his handsome head, sending his silver mane flying like a halo around him. "No, please, Wild Spirit, do not turn away from me!" I whispered, feeling the tears form in my eyes. "I can not stand it if you have forgotten me, or if you hate me!" Wild Spirit seemed to comprehend and stepped up to the door of his stall again. I wrapped my arms around his neck and embraced him as brother to brother. Memories, memories, memories. The riding gloves and hat Nick had given to me for my fifteenth birthday. Lying with a cover of dust apon the floor in the tack room next to Wild Spirit?s stall. The bridle and saddle were still well oiled, still well kept, sitting on their racks up apon the wall. I picked up the gloved and dusted them off, smiling bitterly as I tried to pull them on but found them to be too small. "One does grow in two years," I said to myself as I placed them on a shelf. My hard hat was at least still a comfortable fit. There was a sound behind me. I did not turn around. I only ran my hand along the saddle, smiling a bitter sweet smile. I was torn. Yes, I was happy that someone had looked after Wild Spirit in my absence. But I was envious that someone else had ridden him aside from me. "He still loves you," a voice said from behind me. Had word gotten out that quickly? Of my return? I didn?t want to look behind at this person. Less the fear in my mind was true. What if Wild Spirit loved this human better? I could almost feel the other person smiling. "I?m Haruka," the voice said from behind. "I?ve been riding your horse for the past year when I moved here with a close friend. And let me assure you, Darien, that he still loves you." For the first time, I looked at the male form standing in the doorway. A young man, the same age as me, with wavy short dark blonde hair and dark jade green eyes stood there, half leaning apon the wooden door frame. He advanced forward when he saw me acknowledge him. He was dressed in the senior school uniform at my previous school. "Year twelve," he explained, gesturing to the uniform. "Tom told me who you were when I arrived today. He was very shocked when he received the phone call from your parents." I was silent, but then forced the words from my mouth. "Thank you, Haruka, for taking care of him while I was away. I couldn?t have wished for a better person than yourself." He smiled. "Should I leave the two of you alone? I take it you have much bonding to do. Perhaps we could talk another time, Endymion?" The last word was little more than a whisper, and I wondered if it was merely the wind singing in the trees. But before I could clear my suspicions, he had vanished into the rectangle of light. I followed, but he was already gone. A strong wind blew through the trees, and there were the wild calls of the bush birds, screaming of a coming storm. I lifted my head from Wild Spirit?s tear soaked mane, and stood up, sensing with my entire being what the bush said to me. Clouds covered the blue sky, and their greyness reflected in my eyes. There was a promise of hail, and though I cared not whether I was hurt or not, Wild Spirit?s well being meant much to me. I wiped the tears from my face and mounted. It seemed I never wore my hard hat these days. I invited Death. Wild winds tore at us as we raced down the almost forgotten tracks, unfamiliar yet imprinted in my mind. The steady rhythm of the hooves striking the dirt track almost brought peace to me. But then it was gone as we skidded down the steep descend, sending immense clouds of dust and dirt behind us. And then, without warning, Wild Spirit pranced to a halt. Tossing my head back to remove the stray strands of black hair from my eyes, I saw what blocked out path. Our path to shelter, to safety, to peace of mind. School again. Standing at the ever familiar gates, leaning apon them as I awaited the arrival of my best friend and his girlfriend. I think I was shocked beyond belief when I realised they would never come. Others appeared. Strangely, they seemed almost like others. "Hey, Darien. How are you and Wild Spirit getting along?" Haruka asked, walking through the gate, bag slung over one shoulder casually, folder in his other hand. A girl with sea green wavy shoulder length hair stood beside him. Her eyes were deep green blue, and seemed to mirror all that she saw. "Fine, thank you," I replied. "And really, I must do something to repay you for your kindness. He is in the best of shape, and I have only you to thank for it." "I?m sure you will," he smiled, and walked away with the girl following him. "There is something about those two, my Lord. You should be careful around them," Kunzite?s voice said from beside me. "I am no ?Lord?. Give that title to God. I am merely Darien, and I am human," I replied, and without turning to look at him, walked off. ?He is still bitter,? Jadeite?s mental voice entered my mind. ?And he will be so until his soul is complete,? came Nephrite?s reply. ?What of us? We wish to be one,? Zoisite?s random thoughts floated in. ?We will be one when he is one. There is no other way,? Kunzite answered. And then they was silent. I shut them out. Back again. Like travelling though one?s memories. Sitting beneath these trees, on these benches. I had kissed her here, held her hand, loved her. Voices I knew came to my ears, chatting pointlessly about trivial things. They were without care in every way. They were happy, they were at peace. They had what I wanted. And then it all stopped. I did not look up at them. But I knew where they stood, staring at my familiar form. Did they think I was a ghost? "Nick and Dawn did not wish to return," I said softly. "And it is the same with Serena and the others. But I could not stand the life they offered me. And they offered so much yet so little at the same time," I whispered, finally lifting my head to stare at familiar faces. When their expressions did not alter, I smiled, amused by their shocked faces. "Miss me?" I asked, grinning. Haruka, apon a motor bike blocked out path. Michiru sat behind him, arms wrapped around his slender waist, ocean green hair wild in the tearing winds. Like myself, either wore any protection. "It is time we talked, Prince Endymion," the young man said, eyes cold. But then, they always were. My generals did not join my friends and I. They kept at a distance, though never letting me stray far from their ever watchful eyes. I paid them no attention. I wished they would leave. Like elementals, they were. Ever present pesky little spirits. Only they were not weak. They were Angels of Might. Or perhaps Daemons. Classes were as they had always been. But nothing was new to me, what we were taught. In my time of darkness, I had learnt much, forced myself to. I knew more, perhaps, than the teacher. Never the less, I listened, telling myself I was glad to be home, to be almost human, almost innocent. Haruka and his close friend always seemed to watch me. There was almost a sense of distrust, from him to me. His eyes were never welcoming, though he was always polite. The dark blonde haired boy introduced his friend to me in a lunch break as Michiru. David, Luke, nor Claudia knew much about those two, though it was true that they had attended the school for a year now. They had always kept to themselves. Strangely, David muttered something about it had always seemed to him that they were waiting for someone. I shortened up the reins and laid my bare hand against Wild Spirit?s heated neck, calming him. Strange. My heart was beating so very fast. My mount snorted and half reared, high spirited and nervous due to the coming storm and wild gallop. "Why?" was the only word I could form. My generals and I rarely talked now. It seemed to me they despised me. I could not blame them, yet I did not care anyway. I wanted to forget everything, and they were only the constant reminder of my painful life. ?You are so very selfish, Darien,? my soul said to me. ?I don?t want to be hurt,? I stated. ?You fear pain.? ?I do not like it.? ?But a life lived in fear is a life half lived. You are a fool.? ?A fool. Yes. Always have been, always will be. Better to hide in what I know to love than to face the pain. I do not like the pain.? Silence. Bitterness. Kunzite tried the hardest to hide it. He was the most loyal. Jadeite was so very moody, so very angered. Zoisite no longer spoke a word to me. And Nephrite locked himself up with his books and took up staring at the ancient stars. "Because it is time you resumed your duties. You have no place here," Haruka said. I laughed. It was forced, almost insane. My horse reared, striking the air as lightning flashed in the distance. But then I sobered, eyes hard and glaring. "I will do no such thing. I am only human! I am no Prince Endymion! Let me die with no more blood on my hands. I want to be human!" I declared. Thunder reinforced my words. "So you would let the time line destroy itself just because you are afraid?" Michiru asked softly. Her voice was always soft, so very musical. Like silver bells. "Pluto," I whispered. "She is another who likes to see me suffer." To those who blocked my path, I snarled, "I am not afraid! And why should I care? I will merely die, nothing more! Let me die a human!" "Human!" spat Haruka. "If you do not return to the Earth Kingdom, Prince Endymion, you will be the one to destroy billions of lives, if not this entire galaxy! Pluto sent us here a year ago to wait for you. She knew that you would return one day, and we were given the mission to take you back!" "I don?t care!" I cried. But the tears were forming again. They always formed. They were endless. Angel of Tears, please, no more. Stop these tears. "Endymion, the only way you can end the pain, to find peace, is to do what you were born to do," Michiru?s voice floated though the howling wind and my screaming soul. "And what was I born to do?" I whispered, hands turning white as I clutched the leather reins in a death grip. Lightning flashed again, and thunder followed. Closer now. "To be one with our Princess," Haruka finished. My eyes widened. "Who are you?" I demanded. "I am Sailor Uranus, one of the Outer Soldiers, protector and guardian of the Moon Kingdom," Haruka replied with a touch of pride. "And I am Sailor Neptune, also one of the Outer Soldiers, protector and guardian of the Moon Kingdom," Michiru added softly. I shut my eyes, comprehending it all. Yet, what was there to comprehend? I knew, my soul knew. Knew it all. It was destined, it was fate. And that I could not change. But I still ran. Why was I so afraid to accept who I was? Why was I so afraid to take on the responsibilities that were mine? ?Because you are human, and humans feel fear. It is human nature,? the soul said once more. ?I do not want to fear anymore. I think I want to be one. To be one with my other half of my soul. To silence you,? I whispered to my mind. It laughed at me. ?I am you.? "Not yet," I whispered. "I can not stand it yet." "You have no choice," Haruka answered, and swung his motor bike around and rode off. The first stinging piece of ice hit. I teleported back to Wild Spirit?s stall. End Part Four, Chapter One.