Sailorcaffienes by Cocoa and Mocha Cocoa at crystal_aino@hotmail.com and Mocha at nightrose5001@hotmail.com. Cocoa: Welcome to the FABULOUS world of SAILOR MOON- and my humble offering to the fanfiction gods. This story is either going to be a weak parody or *adopts a bored snotty art critic-type voice* a work of extreme depth and meaning. You can choose. Mocha: Don't spend to much time eating sugar while the world stands behind you! Cocoa: *Backs away nervously* Have you been snorting sugar again? Mocha: Eat HEALTHY! Eat SUGAR! Cocoa, now running for her life: Have fun reading our fic! *Cue cheesy dub music...slightly different* Fighting evil by moonlight,(with a revolver) winning love by daylight, (they're paid to) never running from a real fight (unless it's a real fight) They are the ones named....Sailorcaffienes! They'll never turn their backs on their friends,(unless it's Molly, the Official Energy Source for the Negaverse) They are always there to defend (their sugar cache) They are the ones on who we can depend, (to KILL evil when they're sugar high) They are the ones named Sailor... Sailorcocoa! Sailormocha! Cocoa Twist Mocha Swirl With secret powers All so new to them (Cocoa and Mocha: Actually, we always had them) They are the ones named Sailorcaffeines! Fighting evil by moonlight, winning love by daylight, With their Sailorscouts to help fight(Sailorscouts: WHAAAT?!) They are the ones named Sailorcaffienes, They are the ones....Sailorcaffienes! (Cocoa and Mocha: Like our song? Copyright 1998 by Cocoa, Mocha and the Sugarettes) After defeating Rubius, the Sailorscouts thought they had nothing else to worry about for a while. After all, they didn't count on any Black Moon warriors coming soon. They had defeated one of the strongest commanders, and that would show them not to mess with the SAILORSCOUTS! We join our heroes the day after their victorious...victory, at Crossroads Junior High. Miss Haruna walked to the front of the class. "Boys and girls, I would like to introduce two idiots- er, students (everyone sweatdropped) new to Japan. They come from British Columbia, Canada, and I hope you will welcome them and show them around." She brought out two tall girls. Pointing to the first one, she said, "This is Mocha Swirl," and the second one, slightly taller than the first, "This is Cocoa Twist." The two girls sat down at their seats. "Hey," Serena whispered to Cocoa, who had wavy blonde hair, deep blue-grey eyes, and a light complexion, "are those your real names?" "Yup," the girl nodded cheerfully, "and they're pretty strange in Canada, too." Mocha leaned over conspiratorially. "I hear you have heroines in this country called SAILORSCOUTS and they battle evil with magical powers. They?re a really big hit in Canada, and me and Cocoa-" Cocoa prodded her. "Cocoa and I." "Cocoa and I are nuts about the Sailorscouts! We have posters, and knicknacks, and tapes of their shows, and everything!" Serena paused. "Ummm, yeah! They save us when monsters attack, and everything! They?re really cool." Cocoa got stars in her eyes. "I think Sailormoon?s really cool! I wanna be just like her!" Mocha sweatdropped. "Um, I like Sailorvenus!" "Really?" asked Serena. "That?s so cool! I like Sailormoon too! She walked off chatting with Cocoa, paying no attention to the fact that class was still in session, because it?s the Author?s fic, and she CHOOSES to end the classroom session. They?re all outside now, after school. Amy sidled up to Mocha. "So, ummm, whaddya think of Sailormercury?" Mocha thought for a second, which was hard for her because she had limited intelligence. Mocha: HEEEEEY! Cocoa: It?s true, isn?t it? Mocha: NO! Cocoa: Well, it?s a parody, or more like a parody wanna be, so if that makes it funny, so be it. Mocha: Ummmm? Okay! Cocoa: Back to the story. Mocha paused. "She?s okay, I guess, kinda sucky though." Mocha said while walking to her new house with Amy, who was trying to control her rage. "This is my house" Mocha said while pointing this big white box house with four windows and a small front door. "This is your house?" "Yup, my room?s right there," she said while pointing to the top right window. "Come on," Mocha said while pulling Amy in the house. "Wow? this is HUGE!" Amy said in amazement? "Come on my rooms this way!" both girls run up the stairs and in to Mocha?s room, where lies boxes, boxes and more boxes! "WOW! Look at that view!" Amy said while she looked out of Mocha?s back window "You can see all of Tokyo!" "Ya, I know it?s great!" ************************************************************************ "So, you think Sailormoon is the best?" Serena asked hopefully. "Uh huh," Cocoa replied, "I think she?s so cool! She?s got the best powers, and she?s the only one who?s like, human. The rest of the scouts are practically perfect! But Sailormoon, she?s likable." "Why than-um, I mean, why don?t we go meet my friend Raye at the Cherry Hill Temple? "Kay," Cocoa grinned, "then we can go back to my house! Mocha?s probably there already." *At the Cherry Hill Temple* While Serena and Cocoa were hysterically giggling over Raye?s manga, Luna whispered to Raye, "Do you sense something about her?" Raye said, "Yes, but it?s not evil, rather kinda like Serena?s. But powerful?" "Yes," agreed Luna, "we?ll have to watch over her. "Could she be a scout?" asked Raye. "I?ll follow her. If she has a Guardian Cat then we?ll know." "Hey you guys," said Cocoa suddenly, interrupting their revelry, "do you want to come to my house? You could meet my sister Mocha, Raye, and Luna could meet my cat Tigress?" (Cocoa: REALLY! That?s my cat?s real name!) *This is my chance to see if this ?Tigress? is a guardian cat. Could she be? Juno, the lost Cat?" *Cocoa and Mocha?s house* Cocoa stepped into the house, calling "Mocha?" while hearing hysterical laughter echo maniacally through the house. She climbed up to the loft where the T.V was, to see Amy and Mocha laughing hysterically over Ranma ?, as Ranma spilled water on himself and turned into a girl. "Amy?" said Raye and Serena disbelievingly, seeing the empty packages of sugar spread all over the floor, put into water, and mixed with hot chocolate powder. "Want some?" said Mocha, turning towards Cocoa with a crazed look in her eyes and her face covered with hot chocolate powder. "Ummmmmmm? No thanks," said Cocoa, ignoring Raye holding Serena back from the tins of sugar/powdered hot chocolate. "We?re just gonna go to my room to see Tiggy and see if they sell the same Sailormoon stuff from Japan as Canada." The small group of three girls and a cat walked into a room that had Sailormoon posters all over the walls. "Cool," Serena said. "Um," Raye said, trying to act nonchalant, do you have any with Mars?" "Oh, yeah, she?s my second favorite," said Cocoa while Raye grinned. She opened her closet door to reveal three Sailormars posters. "It?s too bad that they don?t sell that many in Canada." A slumbering cat that looked much like Luna, but darker than the purple feline (Cocoa: Hey! She LOOKS like that in the dub!) raised her black head, a silver crescent moon glimmering on her forehead. "LUNA?" she shouted. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" shrieked Cocoa. "My cat talks! I always KNEW cats were intelligent!" "Juno!" shouted Luna joyfully, as she rubbed against the black cat. "AAAAAAAAH! YOUR CAT TALKS!" shrieked Cocoa. Luna and Juno turned to face the girls, while still talking amongst themselves. "The evil has returned?" asked Juno quietly. "Yes," replied Luna, "In the form of enemies from the future." Juno addressed Cocoa. "Cocoa, I hoped I would never have to do this, but here." She did an acrobatic flip that would have broken some human?s backs, and handed Cocoa a sparkling rainbow pen. ************************************************************************ The next day* "Okay girls and boys, guess WHAT? Where going to have a pop quiz on Japans history!" Miss Haruna said while everybody (even Amy! I think that sugar did some thing to her) grumbled about the quiz. Mocha and Cocoa looked at each other in horror! "Japan?s history!?" whispered Mocha to Cocoa "Don?t look at me?" Cocoa groaned. "Here you go," said Miss Haruna while handing out papers to Mocha and Cocoa. "I?m gonna die?" mumbled Mocha to herself. *after school walking in the town with Cocoa* Looking down at their quiz papers, "F! I got a F on this darn quiz!" Mocha said in disappointment. "Yeah I know! I?ve never gotten this low at home!"(meaning Canada) Cocoa replied. Then at that moment thud! Mocha?s school paper went flying, and she fell on the ground in a sitting position, "Ahh great! Now look what I?ve done!" "Are you okay?" Mocha looked up into dazzling blue eyes "Yes, I?m fine, thank-you." "Are let me help you up" the guy said while he helped Mocha up. "Thank-you." "Here are your papers," "Oh?thanks." "COME ON, MOCHA WE?VE GOTTA GET HOME!!" Cocoa yelled from down the street. "Well I gotta go! Bye and thanks." "Coming!" she yelled as she run down the street. "He?s SO cute! Don?t ya think?" Mocha asked Cocoa in a dreamy way. "Oh yeah, I forgot! I gotta go meet Amy! I was going to help her shop for sugar products with as much caffeine as possible in them! Bye!" Cocoa walked home gloomily. "What?s mom gonna say? This is only the?ummm? fifth test I?ve failed." Cocoa threw the failed test paper over her shoulder, and cringed when she heard it hit someone behind her. *Crap. All I need.* "Sorry," she apologized as she turned around. "I-" The guy...Very hot I might add, with stormy blue eyes and ebony hair, opened her balled test paper and sweatdropped. "A FAIL?! Look at these questions! How easy does it take for you to PASS a test?! *His looks sure don't match his personality!* Cocoa thought. "Hey, I'm from Canada, okay?" She grabbed her test paper and stomped off. She was about to open the front door of her house when she heard shouts, screams, and Juno ran up to her. "Cocoa! Transform!" "Into what?" Cocoa said, confused, still finding it hard to believe that her cat was talking to her. "Take out that pen I gave you," Juno said impatiently, "hold it in the air and shout, "Cocoa Caffiene Power, MAKEUP!" Cocoa sweatdropped. "What good is that gonna do? And what's going on?" "JUST DO IT!!!!" Juno screamed, with that funny English accent that Luna seems to have. "Okay." Cocoa took a deep breath. "Cocoa Caffiene Power, MAKEUP!" Instantly she was taken to that place where you go where you transform, where noone can hurt you and you shimmer when you're nude. Swirling rainbow ribbons encased her body, forming into an outfit that would have impressed someone even from the late 60's in it's bright psychadelic colours. Her skirt seemed to swirl with rainbows, as did her neckerchief. Her armbands and neckbands seemed to be made of polished silver, as was the tiara. The jewel was many tiny, clear opals in a spiral pattern, flashing with lots of different colours. She had a gold and silver spiral patterned mask much like Sailor V's. The thigh-high boots were gold and tightfitting, much like Sailormoon's but higher and with platform-style bottoms. A BRIGHT gold brooch intricately carved with no paticular pattern adorned her silver bows. A spiral adorned her neckband and in the bottom of the band that connected her skirt and bodysuit. "Ohmigod I'm rilly a Sailoorscoooout!" She squealed, resorting to a Valley Girl accent in her excitement. "You are SAILORCOCOA, fighter of love and justice, along with the Sailorscouts." Juno explained. "Right now, Zeus is probably explaining the same thing to Sailormocha." "Hey," Sailorcocoa frowned. "My colours, even if I like them, do N0T look like cocoa." "ARRRRRG!" Juno said, almost giving herself a heart attack, "that's because it's the FEELING of cocoa, not the colors. Now, GET GOING!" ************************************************************************ "ME A SAILRSCOUT!?""You got me there Zeus" Mocha said while laughing hysterically on her bed. "NO REALLY, TAKE THIS!" and Zeus did a flip in the air and landed on the floor with something in his mouth. "What is that?" "It's your transformation PEN!!!" "Oh, right!" "LOOK OUT YOUR WINDOW!!!" at this Mocha looked down of her window to see Tokyo before her, "Zeus, what's that light over there that wasn't there before..." "Evil has come to Tokyo! The Sailorscouts fight it but they need help! Hold up the pen and say MOCHA CAFFFIENE POWER, MAKEUP!" "Okay but if this dosen't work then...." "DO IT!!!!!!!!!!" "Okay, okay, okay! MOCHA CAFFIENE POWER, MAKEUP!" Her transformation wand turned into a rainbow coloured sash that twirled around her making a rainbow beam of light that flooded the room with colour, and with that Mocha spontaneously transfroming in to Sailormocha. "WHO...WA...YOU WHERE RIGHT!"Mocha said amazed at this. She looked at her coloured gown (I like to call it that!) "Oh,it's so cool!" Her gown was a purple rainbow colour that seem to spark in the light, her bow was a light pink colour, her sash was a rainbow of differnt colours that wrapped around her waist. The end fell down about to her knees, boots were black platform shoes. Her necklace was purple with a heart on it. "WHAT THE- WHERE'S COCOA!? I'VE GOTTA SHOW HER THIS!!!" "She's at the front door with Juno!" Mocha (sorry) Sailormocha ran down the stairs and out the door. "COCOA look at this" "Well look at this!" the girls both showed off there unifroms for a sec and then remembered that they needed to fight EVIL! "Come on!" Juno and Zeus ran down the street with Sailormocha and Sailorcocoa behind them.. *At the fight* "We need help!" Sailormoon shouted desperately to the Sailorscouts. Unfortunately, no one could help her. Mars was flaming a droid made of scales that was just deflecting her fire, and her evil wards slid right off. Mercury and Venus were attacking a droid that they had to fight through howling winds to get to, that it was generating, Jupiter was trying to electrocute a droid made of some kind of metallic alloy, and Moon's sceptre was in the hands of a cackling woman with long green hair. Esmeraude couldn't use it, but she could keep Sailormoon from using it. Tuxedo Mask was throwing roses from his vantage point atop a telephone pole. The Scouts were fairing badly until... "HOLD IT RIGHT THERE!" Two voices proclaimed from atop another telephone pole opposite Tuxedo Mask. *The screen flashes to the figures two times fast and then rose slower* "WE ARE THE SAILORCAFFIENES! DEFENDERS OF LOVE AND JUSTICE! ON BEHALF OF SUGAR HIGH (AND IF YOU LAUGH AT OUR NAME) WE WILL PUNISH YOU!" Sailormocha jumped down and held out her sash with both hands. hands. "Mocha Internal Sunset Shock!" (This makes sense, seeing that her outfit has colours the colour of sunset slightly after the sun is gone.) Her sash whipped out and swirled around a droid, dissolving it. The splay of multi-coloured light caught another and severely wounded it. Sailorcocoa flipped off the pole and drew out a weapon from nowhere, a long elegant spiraling whip. She twirled it around her head, taking a deep breath and summoning words from nowhere, long forgotten in her memory. "COCOA RAINBOW SOUL WHIP!" The whip extended, wrapping around a droid while sending off sparkles of bright rainbow light which engulfed Esmeraude, forcing her to drop the Moon Sceptre and teleport away. Sailorcocoa and Sailormocha put their sash and whip together, instantly melding. They yelled, "CAFFIENE SUNSET RAINBOW RUSH!" The attack destroyed the last droid instantaneously. All the Sailorscouts detransformed. They turned around, but Sailormocha and Sailorcocoa, the Sailorcaffienes, were gone. THE END! (Copyright 1998 by Cocoa and Mocha, but we doubt that anyone would want to steal it so this sentence has no point) Cocoa: Did you like it? YOU DID? I wrote it ALLL by myself. You hated it?! Ahhh... the doorknob who wrote it is write there. GO FLAME HER! *Pointing at Sailormocha, busy materializing sugar cubes with her extrordinary power and chomping down* Cocoa, Sailormocha still going strong and now onto chocolate chips with the cubes: You can email either Mocha or myself. My address is crystal_aino@hotmail.com (You might recognize it but I doubt it, but I wrote a fic called Crystal of Love that I updated this week, so everyone READ IT! Mocha, even though you can barely distinguish her voice from the sugar cubes and maple syrup: Not like Cocoa here a don't have a fan fic out but that's o.k...so.... pleaseeeeeeeeeee e-mail me 2 Cocoa here has HER fun! don't you wanna see the GREAT e-mail back you get if you e-mail me?... ( nightrose5001@hotmail.com ) YEAH! well have a GREAT day, night, afternoon what ever time of day it is at your place in the world...! good-bye..... Cocoa: And if you want another part to this fic, EMAIL BOTH OF US! Even if it's not likely that you DO... Just to brighten our day? Pleeeeease? PS-No, the guys we keep meeting ISN'T Darien? just who will be revealed in time.