TO THOSE OF YOU WHO ARE TRYING TO READ THIS AS A TXT FILE: Save this document on your computer and open it in MICROSOFT WORD ON WINDOWS 98 or else the SPACING will be messed up. IF YOU DO NOT HAVE MICROSOFT WORD IN WINDOWS 98: go to http://members.xoom.com/SMradioplay and read the fic there AS AN HTM FILE! P.S. Turn off the spelling check unless you like those little red lines! ^^;; *.....* = thoughts _....._ = verbal stresses on a word * * * * * Chaos Theory : Author's Reflections Kaelali_Su@hotmail.com 6/30/00 Still don't get it? Okay, here, in a condensed blurb, is what the whole thing was about. I have a much longer and more detailed version of this, explaining all the symbolism, metaphors, and hidden subplots that I compacted into ten tiny acts and an epilogue. Only the very major things will be explained here, using no pretty words, only the blunt outlines. Or as blunt as I can get. It gets pretty confusing. The longer version will become available upon request, and will also be posted on SMR and the website. Okay, here goes nothing. The entire story takes one moon cycle, from the moment with Mamoru, kissing under the moon, to the end, kissing with SEIYA under a full moon. Symbolism? Let's not go there right now. When Chaos was defeated, some of It escaped into Usagi's starseed, and there It began to grow, using her as Its host. Chaos cannot do any real damage on Its own, and It needs something to channel Itself through. It really isn't evil in essence, but by Its very nature, It is the Undoer, the Unmaker. It in Itself can never be Unmade or destroyed, only reformed and spread out, because it is no solid thing persay, more of an idea, or a force of nature. Using Usagi as Its channel, It seeped into her soul and polluted her being, changing her personality and ruining her friendships, unmaking everything she had build over the years. Now, Chaos is not the only source of problems for her, she is also very confused on where her relationships stand, just having lost and regained everything that she loved in the final battle of the Stars Season, and losing the one person she had depended on for roughly the last seven months (approx. the length of the Stars Season) forever. She of course cared very deeply for Seiya, and had changed a lot in Mamoru's absence, but she still loves _him_ (Mamoru) as she can love no one else. But that doesn't change the doubt that creeps up inside, the line between what Chaos is forcing on her and what are her own fears indeterminable. Oh, the whole locket subplot: The locket symbolized the love between the Princess of the Moon and the Prince of Earth, and the love between Usagi and Mamoru up until the point of his departure to America. Nice, and pretty to remember, but a part of the past and unreachable. When Usagi destroys it, she destroys the old ties between her and the man she loves, Mamoru being completely unaware that the past is past, and that they have to start over in their relationship. Setsuna returns to guard her place, unaware of what Chaos has done because Chaos, the random, unpredictable force that It is, is woven so deeply into the fabric of the universe, that It has disrupted the Time Streams, creating a little hole where she should have been able to foresee this disaster. The inners are unable to transform because Chaos, while It was spread throughout the universe and Galaxia collected what did not fly into Usagi, was inside each inhabitant of the universe, and that was a small block from their transformations. If they had tried to use their old transformation wands after Galaxia purified them, they would have been able to transform, and so may still transform using the original wands in the future to face Wise Man. The Starlights are unhappy on their planet, Seiya for the obvious reason of, hey, the girl he/she loves is back on earth, and the others because they loved that planet, integrating themselves with the earth cultures so deeply that they feel homesick for a place they were never born to. This tears Princess Kakyuu apart, since she loves Fighter deeply, but truly Fighter has been completely replaced by Seiya in all but the female body he/she inhabits. So they return, Usagi's soul deeply corrupted by now, and though Usagi is no longer pure, parts of her still shine through, one of them being the purity of her relationship with Seiya, and their strong friendship. The reason that Chaos was so easily able to corrupt Usagi and Mamoru was because It was fueled by her own self-doubt and abandonment issues that still lingered, even after Mamoru has returned to her and she knew he had not purposefully left her alone. Such a deep hurt as she suffered is not so easily healed in one night. Usagi tries to reach out to Seiya, to help him understand this thing growing inside her, but they are interrupted, and everything is left unsaid. But she is still able to somewhat communicate to him, and he brings out what is left of her, the trust and friendship between them growing stronger and stronger as he seems to her to be her only escape from her own hatred, given to her by Chaos. He makes her remember the good things in life, briefly renewing her love for everyone and for her future, and for Mamoru. Galaxia is nothing but a diversion to make you think that she can heal everything, and plays no real, firm part in this until the final battle, when her true role becomes apparent and this story gets really confusing. I'm trying to go in some kind of order here! ^^;; Mamoru, also possessed by bits and pieces of Chaos, doesn't always make the correct decisions or accurate observations, but he is only a way to help break down Usagi more, making Chaos's access to her power easier. Finally, he breaks her, and Chaos overwhelms her last defenses and reaches the infinite power hidden in her starseed, also known as Cosmos, the power of the entire universe. The Starlights are affected by this, their sicknesses reflecting the sickness of the universe and it's plague, Chaos, because all three of them have to power to transform and therefore are connected to the galaxies and the planets. Mamoru is sick because of the sickness inside his lover, and they, up until the point of the locket being destroyed, are bonded together by fate. When she breaks that bond, she breaks his connection to her, and he, unable to transform, is oblivious to the sickness of the galaxies. When Mamoru's part is done in the process of breaking Usagi, It leaves his body, and he realizes how strange his behavior over the past few months has been, and he regrets actions that were not truly his own. Usagi stages her own kidnapping, luring the senshi to the docks. There, she rants about her life, taking real problems and twisting them out of proportion, as Chaos has her believing lies that are only half formed truths. Chaos convinces her to destroy her own starseed, thereby granting Chaos full and easy access to her Cosmos powers. In her new form as Cosmos, Usagi can channel the energies of the entire universe, magnified by Chaos. Galaxia, having been in the same position, tried to reason with the sane parts of her, not realizing that Usagi truly is dead. Her starseed gives Chaos power, but since Galaxia gave up her starseed before Chaos took completely over, she did not have as much power as Cosmos does now. Setsuna returns, and, not at full power quite yet, Cosmos retreats. Here's what happens with Setsuna : She was watching through the doorways in what seemed like real time, saw Chaos emerge from Usagi and attack the defenseless senshi. She jumped way into the future, to a time where the senshi (maybe the current senshi's daughters even?) need new powers to defend their galaxy, took the henshin wands from there, then jumped back into the moment before Cosmos attacks, using her new, stronger powers to deflect Cosmos's attack. The Starlights are alright (more or less) again because the sickness has become the thing it was infecting, and the symptoms have already passed. The corruption can go no further at this point. Really really short summary of the scene with Michiru, Haruka, Hotaru, and the cards : Hotaru, symbolized as the ace of spades (lets not go into the symbolism of each card right now) will end the war. Michiru and Haruka transform, and Hotaru ages by a few years. The added maturity of her body shows the maturity of her powers. Starlights also receive new powers. Cosmos creates a girl who looks like Sailor Moon. Here once again is the theme that everything that was can no longer be, and Sailor Moon is destroyed, just as she was only a shadow of the real person, she is also in the past and unreachable. Usagi will never be able to become Sailor Moon after Cosmos is destroyed. Mamoru is still reluctant to fight because he still blames himself for the things he unknowingly did under the influence of Chaos. Eventually, his need to protect and his love for Usagi overcome his self doubt. The inners transformations are "---- Galaxy Girl, Make Up" because they are now soldiers of the entire universe, and not just their respective planets, just as Sailor Moon was elevated to the soldier of the entire cosmos. Canopic jars = Canopic jars held the organs of deceased pharaohs in ancient Egypt. Canopic jars in this story hold the cast of remains of the force that once ruled the universe, Chaos. Okay....now, about the final battle. Cosmos spits her essence into Galaxia, calling them bonded now, sisters. This is true on more than the first and obvious level. Galaxia and Cosmos were, in the truest sense, sisters of fate, both destined to bear the burden of Chaos because both could survive it. Galaxia's starseed, Chibi-chibi, was sent out to Usagi, who was also the hidden form of her future, Sailor Cosmos. When Usagi received Chibi-chibi as Sailor Cosmos, she also battled Chaos, and as with Galaxia, had to be destroyed and remade. The grassy fields of Usagi's "dream" were actually the essence of Chibi-chibi, surrounding and gathering the torn souls that had been wounded by Chaos. After Usagi realized her own power (the power to restore what had been broken), Chibi-chibi left Usagi, and was sent to travel to the next bearer of Chaos, or to wait until such a power would be needed (Chibi-Usa?), and there fore, Usagi lost her power to protect, as Galaxia did. She now can take the offensive position in dire need, and can heal all wounds, but she cannot transform, which is why Usagi is never seen as Sailor Cosmos OR Sailor Moon in the future. Galaxia's restoring powers were shown in her ability to return all the starseeds she had stolen, and in the rebuilding of all the galaxies she had destroyed. Galaxia never transformed per say, but donned her golden armor as a soldier of the Galaxy, attacking Sailor Moon, but unable to really defend. In Hotaru's narrative in act 10, she refers to a girl named "Nisi Nirvana," which roughly translates to "until heaven." Heaven itself possesses no evil and there are no threats to the angels dwelling there. Until Heaven on earth can be achieved, i.e. no evil, no threats from outside forces, there will always be someone who has to bear the burden of Chaos, who can repair the damages. But Heaven can never be reached by mortals, and therefore Chaos will always reign over the universe. Nisi Nirvana obviously refers to Usagi, but also to Galaxia, and whoever will take on Chaos next, and so on, until the end of time. Nisi Nirvana and the inspiration for that little story came from a book by Clive Barker (my favorite author) called Imagica. Good book. Anyway...Seiya sacrifices himself for Usagi because he loves her and wishes for nothing but his happiness. But Cosmos is far too gone to realize what she's done, and his sacrifice was for nothing after all. The inners call on the powers of their guardian planets, but the power they receive is CONTROLED by Cosmos, since she rules the UNIVERSE, and therefore all the planets in it. The outers are freed from their prison, and they all know that they must give up their own lives for the sake of the galaxy. In the split second before Saturn can use her Death Reborn Revolution, Cosmos senses her intentions and attacks, but Pluto freezes time, leaving only herself and Saturn. Saturn approaches Cosmos, wondering if perhaps, after Chaos's vessel is destroyed, if her soul will remain intact, then uses her scythe to end their lives. The broken souls, when the starseeds were destroyed, were released into the universe, their energy becoming one with the energy if the universe. In the second that Pluto froze time, she froze time at the instant of Usagi's death, at the instant when Chaos flees her body, and Usagi loses her powers for good. That instant is the one that is replayed inside Chibi-chibi's essence, the essence of good and order and love, where Cosmos's powers over the universe are used to pick out and separate the souls of her friends and herself from everything else in space, and place them back into the bodies they belong in. While Usagi loses her powers over the universe when she gives up Cosmos, she still has the infinite power of love and healing inside her, and can restore to life the bodies with their replaced souls. When she brings back Mamoru, Chibi-chibi is no longer needed to hold the souls to this second, and lets time go, replacing them back on earth. Mamoru proposes, and life continues on the same path that it always had, the same path that everyone thinks they are being led upon, but that future was build BEFORE Chaos was ever conceived. Chaos created a small jump in time, allowing certain circumstances for the senshi to wander from the given path, the one provided and given to them, the one for Crystal Tokyo. Here is where I take a break from this train of thought to explain the title and meaning of Chaos Theory. Chaos Theory is a model that says that the future is impossible to predict, unless you know EVERYTHING about the initial conditions, to an infinite degree of accuracy, which is impossible, and how even the smallest miscalculations will lead to rapidly growing errors in your ability to predict where the future is headed. Seiya feels that he must leave, because when he spent the night at her house that first time and they stayed up all night talking, she told him of everything that she was (Princess of the moon), and everything that she will be (Queen of Crystal Tokyo) and he realizes that she never once describes any sort of soldiers other than the ones of the planets in her galaxy, and he knows that he and the two other Starlights won't be around to help her battle Wise Man. When Usagi and Seiya kiss, it is not the fact that she necessarily chose him over Mamoru (when she says "But I love him," it can't be told who she means), but it is simply the IDEA that she does not have to follow the given path that screws everything up. She has never been ABLE to CONSIDER the idea that she could live another way, that she doesn't HAVE to marry Mamoru, that she doesn't HAVE to become queen, and that she could live happily in many other situations. This concept affects the way she thinks about her engagement to Mamoru, and the way she thinks about herself and her future, and so now the POSSIBILITY of another future is open. Usagi may still very well choose the same path she would have without knowing, or she may choose something completely different. But that POSSIBILITY destroys everything that that trust in the future held, and opens not just that golden gate to Crystal Tokyo, but a thousand other gates as well. And so, the future that was BUILT UPON HER IGNORANCE of these other open doors, the one where Chibi-Usa is born as her daughter, CANNOT BE. Therefore: Chibi-Usa never returned to the past, the Dark Moon Family never attacked, the Dead Circus could never have attacked because Pegasus appeared to Chibi-Usa and they merely followed him, so the Circus would never have been lead to earth, and so therefore, everything after the point of the battle with Beryl would never have taken place. Pluto realizes this, and tries to stop Seiya and Usagi's kiss, but since she could not have foreseen the full implications of Chaos, and this is part of Chaos's work, she isn't able to prepare for this eventuality. Time and matter are undone in this paradox. What happens now? There are many theories on time travel and wormholes, and what sort of thing would happen if such a paradox were to occur, such as the future and present self colliding, preventing the other from moving forward in time and we would be stuck, or time could simply dissolve and destroy itself, or we could be stuck repeating the paradox over and over from its beginning to end, or...... There are endless possibilities. Chaos Theory. Sequel? You betcha.